Game 54: Unmitigated Disaster

Leyland: Hey, Raburn, you’re our starting second baseman now that that slug Sizemore is finally gone. [puffs on cigarette]
Raburn: Woohoo! Consistent playing time! Yay!
Leyland: On second thought, I think I’ll bench you again for no reason other than that I’m a dick.
Raburn: Oh.
Leyland: Wait, you have terrible numbers against Duensing and Andy Dirks is a better fielder, so I’m going to start you against Duensing and put you in left field again. The Twins won’t know what hit ’em!
Raburn: ……………………………

Basically, this is what happened in the last couple days.

Leyland must just be doing this to fuck with Raburn. He hates him and wants him off the team but DD is reluctant to just cut bait and eat his salary, so Leyland is engaging in an elaborate mindfuck with Raburn until his spirit is broken and he quits on his own.

This is cruel and unusual, Jim Leyland. CRUEL and UNUSUAL.

* * *

Raburn, everybody’s favorite whipping boy that isn’t named Jim Leyland, got a base hit.

* * *

… what in blue blazes just happened.

* * *

Via beckjason, Tigers beat writer: Leyland on why Raburn over Boesch in LF: Raburn could then move to 2B if Dirks pinch-hit for Worth later.

Oh. I see.

2 thoughts on “Game 54: Unmitigated Disaster

  1. It’s a Jim Leyland conspiracy! That dialog sounds like you were THERE.

    I’m really craving the pure, unadulterated RAGE later on.

    • Jim doesn’t know this, but I live in his head.

      Sorry to disappoint in re the rage. Tried to muster some up over the Raburn outfield gaffes, but I was still on too much of a post-victory high.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s